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  • Those who hesitate, meditate, in the horizontal position… Forever!
  • You can’t learn to swim standing on the beach
  • You can’t practice techniques in a fight
  • The strongest man in the world is the man who stands alone
  • Knowledge advances by steps not by leaps
  • Whatever happens, life goes on
  • Rewards come to those who have the energy to pursue them
  • Those who know do not speak, those who speak do not know
  • God gave man two ears and one mouth so that he can listen twice as much as he can speak
  • It is better to seem a fool and keep your mouth shut than to open it and remove all doubt
  • Winners drip, losers gush
  • There are those that know, there are those that don’t know & then there are those that don’t know they don’t know
  • Man who run in front of car get tired
  • Man who run behind car get exhausted
  • I realised I was dyslexic when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat
  • He who laughs last, thinks slowest
  • Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film
  • I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges
  • Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?
  • Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool
  • It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living
  • Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off
  • It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them
  • You can't have everything, where would you put it?
  • Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population
  • A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well
  • It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats
  • I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it
  • Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
  • "If you build a man a fire, you keep him warm for a day; if you set a man on fire; you keep him warm for the rest of his life."
  • If a person with multiple personalities threatens to kill themselves, is it considered a hostage situation?
  • The early bird may get the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese